One of the words that the Bush Administration likes to throw around when talking about their failing policies is the word PROGRESS. No matter the topic; whether it’s the Iraq War, the economy, jobs, gas prices, you name it and were making “progress” on it. Like any sane and intelligent American I have long wondered what crazy metric they were using to measure this success. Well I have had an epiphany on this and I wanted to share it with you all.

When I first started hearing this I was under the assumption that “progress” was just another insecure platitude to quiet the angry masses. You know, just another way to string out the Iraq war until it becomes the Democrats problem. Now I realize that the conservatives belief that we are making progress is sincere and honest and is exactly the reason why they are unfit for government.

As a liberal and as a fan of facts and reality I tend to define the word progress, in the context used by Republicans, as meaning “the act of moving forward toward a goal”. I naturally measure this progress by how far from the goal we are and by whether or not were getting closer to that goal. I think that this way of looking at the world is not only natural and logical, but its essential for any kind of real success.

As I’m sure you can relate to this definition of progress left me confused and angry whenever conservatives used it. It’s much like accepting the offer of an apple, which you assume to be a red tasty fruit, only to receive a punch in the nose. Now imagine that happening for 7 years. Eventually you figure out that what they call an “apple” isn’t an apple at all and the last thing you want is more of their “apples”.

Understanding the conservative view of progress had me baffled until I realized one thing. For liberals success is dependent on the quantifiable achievement of a set goal. Conservatives seem to accept that success is guaranteed and that all they have to do is wait for it. This assurance of success makes things like timetables, goals, strategy, planning all irrelevant. For America to be successful we simply need to wait.

So when you start with the faith that success is inevitable the definition of progress changes. As their is no goal other than to wait for success the liberal definition of progress makes no sense. The conservative definition of progress is nothing more than the “progress through time”. When conservatives say we are making progress they don’t mean that goals are being achieved or that a sound strategy is being successfully carried out. They simply mean that time is still passing and therefore we are that much closer to our inevitable glorious success.

[youtube width="250" height="197"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=biX0qI1P7B4[/youtube]

With that in mind watch this short clip taken from Keith Olberman’s 5/1/2007 episode. You will see that if you think of the word progress as a rational acceptance that time has not stopped the words of George Bush make sense. See that piece in context here.

This method of government that the conservatives are offering has clearly not worked. I would be interested in hearing a single thing that the Bush Administration has actually made better. If we allow another conservative like John McCain to be elected we can expect 4 more years of Republican “progress”.